SALT

I can NOT be the 1st person to lose a baby while pregnant with them. In fact I KNOW I'm not. I can NOT be the 1st person to have to go to the OB's office after a loss either.

I am really upset with how things were handled. I am saddened, hurt & angry at the lack of sensitivity towards women whom have just lost their babies.

Let me help you understand: my heart is aching so very badly because I will never get to hold, cuddle or look at my son ever again. You see, he died when I was 16 weeks pregnant with him.

Now if you can imagine my pain & sorrow. Truly imagine it. Now imagine 4 weeks after loosing your son, you have to go to the waiting room office of FULL of pregnant happy women. You go to check in while trying to hold back tears. The receptionist is pregnant. She informs you that because YOU are NO longer pregnant you have a $45 co-pay for your office visit. You are also going to be seen by some random Dr because yours is out sick...again. But no one informed you ahead of time so that you could have made the decision before hand to be seen by a stranger or wait until your Dr is back. You are then told to go sit & wait in that same waiting room with ALL those pregnant women. You sit & try not to bawl your eyes out while waiting to be called back to be seen.

Now I want to know, if 1 in 4 pregnancies end in a miscarriage or a loss, then why the heck isn't there more sensitivity towards those women? Why isn't there a special office or waiting room we could be sent too so we aren't faced with the reality once again that our babies are no longer with us. Instead we are forced to sit with other pregnant women. Now, Let's just POUR SALT into their open wounds. Let's just make matters worse for that mom whom might be contemplating suicide so the heartache will just end. Let's just allow her to suffer in silence.

I don't want to feel alone any more. I don't want to be mistreated by insensitive personnel any more. I don't feel it's right. Women need to be informed that there is a high chance that their baby might not make it to full term or even if it does, that it doesn't guarantee a happy, healthy baby in the end.

I left my appointment this morning, MORE depressed. MORE hurt. MORE angry. MORE disappointed. Moms shouldn't have to leave their appointments feeling this way. The medical field is lacking in empathy. It's lacking in the ability to truly help their patients when they need it the most. I hope my words will be taken into account. Things need to be changed. Especially in regards to women after a loss.